Wow-it has def been a while since I have blogged....well, I guess I can't even say that I "blog" since I really don't share it with anyone-yet.  Not sure what I'm afraid of---other than letting my emotions get away with me and saying something that will make someone think less of me.  I worry about being "Emotionally Slutty"  I guess.  Everyone who really know me KNOWS that I wear my heart on my sleeve and I'm a worrier.  I am a coward.  I am a lot of things.  I "label" myself daily...don't we all?  Just like this blog---I quit it-so, I'm a quitter.  I didn't go on my nightly walk tonight-so. I'm lazy.....I could go on and on with the labeling.  I need to focus on the "positive" labels that I AM...a Mother, Wife, Sister, Daughter, Friend...and a good one at that, I THINK (there I go, doubting....always doubting).  I think I am pretty good at all of those things...I love people deeply, I think I am caring and loving, but am I???  Or am I delusional???  We all know those people who we just don't understand - they are a little crazy, seem to think of only themselves, overly sensitive, negative, bitchy, moody and everything always needs to be on their terms and what works for them...and you just don't understand why they are the way they are.  But then I question how my friends/family sees me?  What do I really look like from the outside looking in.  I do think if most of us could see ourselves from the outside and see our emotions in play and how we react to things good/bad/ugly we would probably not even realize that we are the way we are.  I know so many people who really don't even realize how they ARE...I see many types of people every day - mostly in a not so comfortable experience for them...I have learned a lot.  I have learned how people's emotions really control their actions and to not take some things so seriously.  These days I pour out kindness no matter how I am being treated and keep giving it even if it is not be reciprocated.  I have been choosing to act in a way that makes me feel good about myself...no more re-acting to others emotions and actions.  It can be difficult at times, but this is how I choose for others to see me.  <3